Thank you for your swerveus 

Fun party questions

1. Are you weirder than your dad?
2. Do you work harder than your parents? Do you want your kids to work harder than you? 

 I've gone from thirty and flirty to forty and farty.

 If the purpose of the bible is to spread the word of god, and there is such a wide gulf in interpretation of the bible (from justifying slavery to loving thy neighbor) does the bible accomplish its purpose?

 I'll have this done by the end of the weak.

True story

 Instead of sexual fantasies I have athletic fantasies, like someone will steal a purse in a crowded square and I'll run after them, hitting them with a can of thrown peas while they are running a diagonal route. And I'll point to someone to call 911 while I'm chasing after the second guy. Or something subtle will tip me off that the apocalypse is coming and I'll sprint non-stop the 30 blocks to save my daughter from her daycare right in the nick of time. And then I'll have to chase down a car on foot to keep them from getting away and starting the apocalypse.

Sure, I'm a one percenter. But doesn't that also make me a minority?